My homemade granola 'craise'

So, I have a secret I've been stashing in my kitchen cupboards for about 10 months now: When I was pregnant, I bought every flavor of Ocean Spray Craisins in a single trip to the grocery store.

Here's what's left of the coolsaster
that was my Craisin spree.

Pregnant women can sometimes have interesting relationships with food. I never went nuts with overeating or having crazy cravings, but I definitely had my quirks. And that one summer evening, standing in Dahl's Foods, I went quirky in the dried fruit aisle. I was going to buy regular Craisins, and then I saw the different flavor infusions available and LITERALLY COULD NOT DECIDE which flavor sounded yummiest. I was standing there like a freak for at least five minutes with absolutely no hope of achieving clarity about this very important purchase.

So I threw them all in my cart.

Now of course I didn't go home and eat all the Craisins after that, so it's now almost a year later and I still have several Craisins at my disposal.

But! I've found a good way to use them: homemade granola.

And yes, it's worth the effort to make your own. Soooo much more flavor than store-bought. There are a lot of different recipes out there for homemade granola (and they all sound fantastic), but the basic formula is the same for most recipes: toss old fashioned oats and nuts in a sweetened oil-based mixture, bake, and add dried fruit. I've made such flavors as cinnamon/cranberry, walnut, vanilla almond, "garbage," and everything in between. Here's a basic template to follow for making your own at home.

1) Preheat your oven to 350.

2) Whisk together your "granola glue." For me, this generally consists of about 1/2 cup of oil (vegetable, walnut, hazelnut, grapeseed are all good options), 1/2 cup of brown sugar, and two egg whites, plus any flavor infusers you want to use (honey, cinnamon, vanilla extract, maple syrup, etc., etc.).

3) In another bowl, mix together the oats with any nuts you want to include (almonds, pecans, walnuts, etc. -- if you want to use cashews, wait until the end to add those). Another thing I always add to this mixture because, why not? It's good for you: flax seed meal. Just 1/4 of a cup or so. Pour the "glue" on top of the oat mixture and combine thoroughly.

4) Brush a rimmed metal baking sheet with a small amount of cooking spray or nut oil and spread the granola on it.

5) Bake the granola in three 15-minute intervals. Use a metal spatula to stir it every 15 minutes. With about 10 minutes to go, I like to add the dried fruit (chopped pitted dates, golden raisins, CRAISINS, etc.) and sometimes also drizzle some extra honey over the top to help boost the sweetness and crunchiness.

6) Cool the granola on a clean baking sheet and store in an airtight container.

Malted Milk Cookie Tart

Warning: Do not eat this if you are one of those types who only eats nuts and berries you pick up off the ground. There are no healthy ingredients in this dessert -- only mostly butter and sugar. It is easily one of the tastiest, most decadent treats I've tried. So yeah, it's a a favorite recipe.

Next time I post a recipe, I'll try to make it be for vegetables a la whole grain or something like that. Maybe.

MALTED MILK BALL COOKIE TART

1 1/2 c. all-purpose flour
1 c. malted milk powder
1/2 c. sugar

1 tsp. coarse kosher salt

1 c. unsalted butter, cut into 1-in. pieces (room temperature)
1/2 c. bittersweet chocolate chips (do not exceed 61% cacao)

1/2 c. malted milk ball candies, coarsely chopped

1) Preheat oven to 325. In a food processor, pulse flour, malted milk powder, sugar, and salt. Add butter' pulse until moist clumps form.

2) Transfer dough to work surface and gather into a ball. Press evenly into the bottom of a 9-in. tart pan with removable bottom (can also substitute 9-in. glass pie plate).

3) Bake crust until evenly golden brown, about 45 mins. Remove from oven and immediately scatter chocolate pieces over; let stand 5 mins. to soften, then spread melted chocolate over hot crust and into the well that will form as the center sinks.

4) Sprinkle candy pieces over top. Cool completely before removing from pan and cut into wedges to serve.

Noms.

About Pat

I don't personally know Pat Summitt and wouldn't pretend to, but her coaching career seems to have been linked to my life in many ways. So it certainly seemed fitting that, when she coached her last official game for the Tennessee Lady Vols last month, I was there.

Growing up with a die-hard Iowa State fan and hoops-playing father, I knew college basketball from a young age. But I mostly knew Iowa State men's basketball. Two-hour drives to Hilton Coliseum to watch Johnny Orr coach such players as Jeff Grayer and Fred Hoiberg were a fun treat and fond memory from my childhood.

Iowa State had a women's basketball team in the 1980s -- I now know this -- but it wasn't something I was really aware of at the time. When ISU hired Pam Wettig as its coach in 1985, the story was mostly of interest because her sister was an actress on the TV show Thirtysomething. The Iowa State team wasn't very good and the sport didn't have the national respect or parity it enjoys today, so I didn't know much about the team from my favorite school.

I just knew the Lady Vols.

Well, that's not entirely true. I also remember watching Dawn Staley at Virginia, Charlotte Smith at North Carolina, and of course the Lady Techsters with those short-sleeved uniforms. When I was a kid, the ONLY women's basketball you would ever see was the Final Four...so the only teams I knew were the ones that achieved at that level. But boy, did I love watching it and loved cheering for Tennessee. Realizing girls and women could play basketball beyond the driveway (the only place I had ever played at that point) was an awesome revelation to me. It inspired me. Then, when I realized that women could coach women's basketball, I just simply fell in love with Coach Summitt.

When HBO came out with its documentary "The Cinderella Season" when I was a freshman in college, I think I watched it about 10 times. There was something inspirational to me about seeing a woman be so successful and powerful in a stereotypically male role. I guess you could say that Pat Summitt was a natural role model for me.

As a regular media volunteer for these sorts of things, I was fortunate that the Lady Vols came to Iowa for the NCAA tournament twice in my lifetime. Of course, last month I never saw Pat Summitt any time but during the games. Frankly, I think it was a sad weekend for a lot of us: how shockingly sad it was for those of us who aren't close to the program but have long admired Summitt to see how quickly her health really was deteriorating. And how sad it is to think about anyone having to go through what she's going through.

But Holly Warlick was awesome, and I know she'll do a tremendous job taking over the program and building on Pat's enormous legacy.

And perhaps it was she who said it best when a reporter asked about Summitt’s fiery demeanor on the sideline against Baylor in that last game: “That’s Pat. Her love of the game, she’s not lost that. She may forget where her phone is, but she’s not gonna forget to yell at the officials. She’s still competitive. I don’t care what disease she has; she’s gonna go down swinging."

Although I was supposed to remain neutral, I was rooting for Pat not to go down but to keep swinging. But I know, in her way, that she will.

Thank you, Pat!

Let's keep it real

I've had it with the mommy bloggers. (Also: the term "mommy bloggers," but I digress. Already.) But you know what I mean: the ones with blogs organized into categories like "Fashion," "Organic Baking," "Breastfeeding while Jogging," and "Economics Dissertation"? I mean, come on. Just because someone can pretend she has her crap together in a daily blog post does NOT mean she isn't really just like the rest of us: accidentally brushing her teeth with diaper rash cream, creating a borderline Hoarders situation in the guest room, and having buckwild crying jags over things like not being able to open a jar of fancy olives.

Because these things are just part of being a new mother.

It's not easy, but we all feel like it should be easy or else we are bad, bad, bad people. The hormones just totally take over.

I mean, seriously: the crying. I've gone full-on John Boehner over topics ranging from debilitating baby farts and malfunctioning wireless routers to particularly sympathetic Cupcake Wars contestants. Clearly I have trouble discerning what's worth waterworks these days. And when I start to think about what a bad wife, mother, friend, employee, exerciser, or homemaker I perceive myself to be it gets, um, really not good.

So yes, I'll admit it: I am a bit of an emotional mess. A high functioning emotional mess, I'd say -- but an emotional mess nonetheless. And based on some things I've slowly learned from talking to others, I think I can expect to be for the rest of the first year of motherhood. I am annoyed that the books, doctors, and other expert types seem to like asserting that your emotions will normalize in eight weeks. Because guess what? When I didn't stop being an emotional trainwreck after eight weeks, I got a whole lot more emotional trainwrecky.

Not that I'd ever do it, but staying off the innernets would help us all. A person could spend hours online in those perfect little mommy universes and see all the wonderful displays of domestic goddess-ness. But don't go there. It's just an illusion. Enjoy the Instagram photos of homemade peach cobbler and try not to make comparisons. Deep down, we are all nervous wrecks with disorganized piles of baby gear in the basement and toilet paper stuck to our shoes.

Over the last few months I have learned from reading online that, no matter what may be frustrating or concerning you about parenting, you apparently have absolutely no right whatsoever to complain about it. Now, let me be clear: I am not pro-complaining. It's annoying and no one wants to hear it. But just the other day, I saw an editorial piece asserting that parents specifically had no right to complain about any of the challenges of parenting because, well, they chose to be parents.

But aren't most things people complain about things they chose to bring upon themselves? "My boss is a d-bag." (Stop complaining! You CHOSE to work there.) "My legs are sore from this workout." (Shut up and don't complain! You CHOSE to order P90X from that infomercial!) I mean, I suppose these are valid responses to these types of complaints...but I think most people would consider you an a-hole if you actually said them.

So that's something else to feel guilty about. Have I lost perspective? Am I just as whiny and out of touch as the awful subjects on STFU, Parents? Oh, god: I forgot to work in worrying about that when I was busy feeling guilty about not spending enough time with my husband, not baking a birthday cake from scratch, and not blogging my baby's developmental milestones.

But that's the thing, isn't it? Apparently the first year of motherhood is pretty much all about feeling like an inadequate person with a virtually limitless list of things to feel guilty about. It's an adjustment of your time, your resources, and your hormones for which you will never actually be prepared. So give up, give in, and give me some chocolate cake and a box of wine.

And try to cut yourself some slack. Have a good cry if you want to. But you know what will always cheer you up at the end of a long day of neglecting your child while doing your job poorly?

WIS WITTO FACE.



Or insert your own favorite face here. Because, seriously: So cute and so worth it!

Vegetarian Tacos

One of our favorite easy weeknight dinners is tacos and, frankly, I think some of the best ones are of the veggie variety. Here are two super easy, super tasty recipes I recommend.

BLACK BEAN TACOS WITH FETA & CABBAGE

1 15 oz. can black beans, drained
1/2 tsp. ground cumin
5 tsp. olive oil, divided
1 T. fresh lime juice
2 c. cabbage coleslaw mix
2 scallions, chopped
1/3 c. chopped cilantro
1/3 c. crumbled feta
Sriraccha sauce (or your hot sauce of choice)
taco shells

1) Mash together beans & cumin in a small bowl.
2) Heat 3 T. olive oil and cook beans over low heat.
3) In a medium bowl, mix lime juice, coleslaw, scallions, and cilantro and toss in 2 T. olive oil. Season to taste with salt & pepper.
4) Fill taco shells with beans and top with coleslaw mix, feta cheese, and hot sauce.

SUPER VEGGIE TACOS

2 T. olive oil
2 medium zucchini, diced
3 scallions, sliced
1 can corn, rinsed & drained
1 can pinto beans, rinsed & drained
2 c. baby spinach, chopped
2 tsp. chili powder
1/4 tsp. ground cumin
1/4 tsp. dried oregano
3/4 c. tomatillo salsa (salsa verde)
sour cream
white cheese
lime wedges
taco shells

1) Heat 2 T. olive oil in a large nonstick pan over medium high heat. Add zucchini and scallions and cook appx. 5 minutes. Add chili powder, cumin, and oregano. Cook appx. 1 min. Season to taste with salt & pepper.

2) Stir in beans, corn, spinach, & Salsa. Cook until spinach wilts.

3) Fill taco shells with veggie mixture. Serve with sour cream, cheese, and lime wedges.