Anatomy of the world's worst college bowl picks

The law of averages would suggest that one has a 50 percent chance of correctly selecting the winner of a given college bowl game, even if one has no knowledge whatsoever of college football and blindly guesses the outcome. Why, then, do you suppose it is that I have been correct on less than half of this year's games? I now submit, for your entertainment and education, an actual example of how a person can do THIS poorly in a college bowl pick'em. It's scary, I know...

Poinsettia Bowl, Navy* vs. Utah -- I picked the Midshipmen here. They only lost by a field goal, but I was still wrong. I think the logic was related to the fact that Navy had killed Army in the last game of the season, but I don't really know what I was thinking. 0-1.

New Orleans Bowl, Memphis* vs. Florida Atlantic -- You guessed it, I picked Memphis. I need to remember that, when you don't really know which team to pick YOU ALWAYS PICK THE FLORIDA SCHOOL. 0-2.

Papajohns.com Bowl, Southern Miss vs. Cincinnati* -- Here's where I made my big rebound and finally got one right. 1-2.

New Mexico Bowl, Nevada vs. New Mexico* -- Okay, that one was easy. Of course you pick New Mexico to win the NEW MEXICO Bowl. 2-2 at this point.

Las Vegas Bowl, UCLA* vs. BYU -- I almost lucked into being correct on this one, but UCLA was a stupid pick. I think I had an over-inflated opinion of the Pac-10 (See disastrous Holiday Bowl pick below.) 2-3.

Hawai'i Bowl, Boise State* vs. East Carolina -- Okay, NO ONE picked ECU. Give me a break on this one. 2-4.

Motor City Bowl, Purdue vs. Central Michigan* -- I picked Central Michigan. Oops. I think proximity to home and my tendency to think the Big Ten is too slow to win bowl games resulted in my wrong choice here. Also, I forgot Brian Kelly didn't coach CMU anymore. Okay, I didn't -- but it sounds like a good excuse. 2-5.

Holiday Bowl, Arizona State* vs. Texas -- Wrong again. I picked ASU because all I heard about all year was how wonderful they were. I will also take the liberty here of using the excuse that I was in Italy when Iowa State played Texas and was unable to witness for myself exactly how bad they annihilated us. I'm an idiot; 2-6.

Champs Sports Bowl, Boston College* vs. Michigan State -- The general strategy of picking against the Big Ten pays off here as I move to an impressive 3-6.

Texas Bowl, TCU* vs. Houston -- I think the fact that I mentally associate TCU with Texas Bowl victories, seeing whereas it earned one against my team in 2005 (boo), led me to the correct choice. Hot damn! 4-6! P.S. If I never hear TCU's train whistle again it will be too soon.

Emerald Bowl, Maryland vs. Oregon State* -- The fact that I watched the Beavers beat the Ducks at the end of the season probably made me think they were better than they actually are, but I did correctly guess that they would take down the Turtles. Also, I am a resident of Beaverdale and have a sweet foam Oregon State beaver hat, so I felt an obligation to select the Beavs. Just saying. 5-6...creeping up on .500!

Meineke Car Care Bowl, Connecticut* vs. Wake Forest -- I know Jim Grobe is a fantastic coach, but I let emotion get in the way of my pick as my friend's nephew is the UConn QB. I picked the Huskies and paid the price. 5-7.

Liberty Bowl, Central Florida* vs. Mississippi State -- I thought picking Florida schools was supposed to be a good strategy. Bah. 5-8.

Alamo Bowl, Penn State* vs. Texas A&M -- Finally. A bowl that I felt confident about picking and ended up being correct about. All was right with the world on December 29. Maybe I will be right again by next Dec. 29. Sigh. 6-8.

Independence Bowl, Colorado* vs. Alabama -- Ray, when someone asks you if you Colorado is going to overcome Dan Hawkins and win a football game you say NO. I would just like to say in my own defense that this was a stupid game. 6-9.

Armed Forces Bowl, California* vs. Air Force -- To be honest, I thought I had picked Air Force until I looked on my pick sheet and saw that I was accidentally correct. Go me. 7-9.

Humanitarian Bowl, Georgia Tech* vs. Fresno State -- I can honestly say I have no idea what I was thinking when I picked Georgia Tech. 7-10.

Sun Bowl, South Florida* vs. Oregon -- Who actually knew that Oregon's replacement for Dennis Dixon was going to be halfway decent? Not this chick. 7-11.

Music City Bowl, Insight Bowl, Chick-fil-A Bowl, Outback Bowl, Cotton Bowl, and Gator Bowl -- I got SIX BOWLS IN A ROW correct! The strategy here was to pick three Big 12 teams and three SEC teams as these are in my opinion the best two conferences in the country this year. I am thoroughly impressed with myself. 13-11!

Capital One Bowl, Florida* vs. Michigan -- This was not my fault. Good for Lloyd Carr, I guess. 13-12.

Rose Bowl, Illinois vs. USC* -- To quote my brother on Christmas to our Illini-fan relatives: "I give them a 3 percent chance." I don't believe there was anyone in America who disagreed with that assessment, including Illinois fans. 14-12, but did I really deserve a point for that?

Sugar Bowl, Hawai'i* vs. Georgia -- This was probably my stupidest pick. Why I got suckered into believing that Hawai'i had a good shot here I do not know. I award me no points, and may God have mercy on my soul. 14-13.

Fiesta Bowl, Oklahoma* vs. West Virginia -- I hate you, Oklahoma. 14-14.

Orange Bowl, Kansas vs. Virginia Tech* -- This one really makes me kick myself. I was one of Kansas' biggest defenders all year. I said I thought they'd win 3 of 5 against Missouri because they have a better defense and speculated that they would have beaten OU in the Big 12 title game. Yet, what do I do on the bowl picks? Let the skeptics get inside my head and pick Virginia Tech. Second dumbest pick. 14-15.

With three games to go, I am counting on Rutgers, Bowling Green, and LSU. Since Rutgers and LSU are both heavily favored, I have a chance to finish 16-16. But I'm not holding my breath. Attaining mediocrity is not my strong suit.